I have to admit that by the time Aaron packed his bags and headed out to San Diego mid-month, we were both pretty ready. There's no doubt that this summer has been a heavy one for both of us, and I think we were each in need of a little space--what I've started calling our "marriage sabbatical."
After attending to some household projects at home, we agreed to meet with a realtor--though I won't deny dragging my feet rather a lot. The plan is to list the house at a price that we feel would make selling now worth it, but if things don't work out that way, to consider renting it out for a while instead. Though I'm not at all enthusiastic about selling this house--which we're reasonably close to paying off, and which I feel like could be a worthwhile long-term investment if we decided to become more mobile as a family in the future--if that's the way the cards fall, I've made my peace with trying to work out a different situation.
While he looks for a place for us to live out in California (he is currently starting his jobs out there and renting a one-bedroom apartment from a family in Rancho Bernardo), I will work on tying up loose ends here and trying to make this move as smooth as possible for the kids. I've also decided to continue teaching KinderKeys classes for 10 weeks, and will be looking for a way for them to continue after I've left with another teacher if possible. Aaron thinks my concern about KinderKeys may be misplaced, but after building this from the ground up, I feel committed to seeing my work carry on if I can.
After he left, I spent the first weeks enjoying the satisfaction of being entirely in charge, as well as having a neatly made bed every single time I go into my bedroom (Aaron has always had a penchant for midday snoozes, and he's never been particularly adept at remaking the bed afterward). He's had the harder end of the deal, having to set up house in a new place concurrently with acclimating to four new jobs, replete with new responsibilities and coworkers. But despite the perks of living apart, I think we're both also starting to feel a bit of the sadness that creeps in with distance. We spent our fifteenth anniversary apart, and while pinging youtube videos to each other was fun, it really just isn't the same as celebrating a beautiful marriage with the one you love. At the end of the day, there's nothing better than spending time together, and I think we will appreciate it anew when that time comes again.
The kids started school shortly after Aaron left, and so far, so good. Asher is enjoying Jazz Band this year, though he's still bristling a bit about being in orchestra as well--an agreement he made with Aaron last year. He seems to like his classes, although he says they're
hard. Addy finally made it into a class with many of her best friends, and is loving it so far. Emerson is happy to be at Whispering Meadows again, and even though Sera didn't manage to score more than two of her kindergarten classmates in her class, she loves her classroom's "camping" theme.
So much in our future is up in the air, and as much as that worries me, it also makes me excited. If life didn't have adventures, it would be entirely too boring. Hopefully between now and when we get everything hammered out, we'll be able to come up with solutions that make us all happy--or at least that we can all live with. Even though I drag my feet and complain my fair share, I am thankful for the strength and growth that only occur when we do hard things.
